March 12, 2012

Dear Follower, Interested, Curious, Intrigued,

If you are new to this blog, welcome to iSAD, take some time to look around, to read who we are and what we stand for. If you have visited before, we are happy to have you back on our blog. It's been a while.

We have debated whether there is still a need for this blog.  You tell us. Up until today we have received 9,427 page views, we have 287 followers on Twitter. To us that is impressive. Last year the blog stirred lots of emotions and strong opinions. We are not here to point fingers at anyone. We just find it difficult to live in the status quo.

Why a new post today? On March 12, 2012, Dietitians of Canada will send out the e-mails with internship application results, e-mails that will change many people's lives. Every year the day it happens is one of the most difficult days to get through for many students, professors, internship coordinators, mentors, parents, friends and families of those who apply. This is why we would like to re-open the conversation as today is a big day for everyone who studies or practices dietetics in Canada.


If you are on the applying side, you are either cheering today, or you are crying. Or both - if you got in, but your close friends did not and you are not sure how to handle the news. Should you share it? Should you hide it? Your families and friends outside of dietetics will probably smugly tell you, "I told you you would get in!" which will make you feel misunderstood, as if your stress leading to this moment and all the talking about how hard it is to get an internship was a waste of their time. You feel bitter-sweet. You are not sure why you got it and your friend didn't. Perhaps she had better marks than you, more experience. You don't know what to say. There is a gap between the two of you. And you don't know how to close it. She smiles and tells you she is so happy for you and you don't know how to react, because you know that behind the smile there is sadness, anger, frustration and panic. If she doesn't get it, how will your friendship survive? What is she gonna do next year? The whole thing does not feel the way you expected. On one hand you want to post it on facebook, tweet about it, message everyone on your contact list. I GOT AN INTERNSHIP! You want to tell the whole world. But on the other hand you want to hide the news. You were supposed to be happy. This is your dream come true, why does it feel so strange?   

If you did not get in, you are at a loss. Genuinely you are trying to be happy for your friends who got in. But it's so hard. You don't want to compare yourself, but you can't help it. You don't understand why your friends got in but you didn't. You especially don't understand why that girl got in. You feel guilty for thinking this way. She deserves it, everyone deserves it. You try to hold back the tears, but at some point you can't fight them anymore. They stream down your face, in a river. You do not understand what happened. You know there is still time, maybe the next round or the one after that, but you can't stop the tears. You realize it will be a very long week. Wherever you are you don't want to be there. You don't want to talk to anyone. You can't look people in the eyes. Your friends are messaging you asking you if you got in, you don't want to reply. You feel like a failure. Big one. Everyone rooted for you and you failed them. You want to curl up and cry yourself to sleep. How many times have you applied? How many times is it going to take? Are you shocked, devastated, or angry? You have done everything you were told. You worked so hard over the last few years to boost your resume and you spent so much time on those letters and everyone who proof read them for you said they were so darn good. You practiced for interviews, you don't know what else you could have done. You ask yourself, what did I do wrong?  You go through the interviews in your head. You try to remember every single question and how the internship coordinator reacted to your answers. What are you going to do next year? You are not prepared for this. You did not have a plan B, you did not want to have a plan B because you thought it would distract you from the goal. This is overwhelming.

Does any of this feel familiar to you? Whichever side you are on, know that you are not alone. Talk about it. Do not be alone today. Find someone who will listen and talk about it. Tell them how you feel, cry, get angry, get it out. Do not be ashamed of your feelings. Be brave. It will make you stronger. Pretending to be strong will make you feel weaker. What you are feeling is normal given the circumstances, whatever you feel. Do not let anyone tell you how you should feel. Be compassionate with yourself. Have empathy. Talk to yourself as if you were your own friend, not enemy. You have done everything right. There is too many equally qualified applicants for too few positions. The system is flawed.

If you have no one to talk to, tell your story here. Your story is important. You can tell your story without identifiers, just tell us how you feel. This blog is a space for us to be real, to stay connected, and possibly change the system. We need to advocate for a system that will benefit everyone, including the students.


We have created an email account to which you can log in and send an e-mail. No one will know who you are.

If you would like to share, here are the instructions:

Log into: anonymouslytoisad@gmail.com           

Password: isadisad

And send your emails directly to: theprojectisad@gmail.com

We will then copy them and post them here as they are without ANY edits.

Alternatively you can post anonymously under this post in a comment. 

Feel free to share this blog with others. The strength is in numbers.

Yours trully, 

iSAD

~~~~~

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has.” Margaret Mead

 

Seconds, Anyone?

The Second Round is here. Are you applying? How are you changing your cover letter? Your resume? Have you sought feedback? If not, why? If yes, was the feedback constructive? How are you feeling? Share with us.

Open Letter to the Ontario Task Force on Dietetic Education and Practical Training

Dear Members of the Task Force,


According to your communication in November 2010, you indicated that a final report would be completed and shared by March 31, 2011. It is now April 20 - almost three weeks has passed without hearing anything from you regarding a proposed new model of education and training. 


You also indicated that you would be seeking input, but to our knowledge no students have been consulted. We would be hard pressed to understand why students have not been consulted since we are central to the education process. If students have been consulted, please let us know. Have interns been consulted? They are also key figures in this process with immediate experience as to how the education and internship model might be enhanced.


It seems to be common knowledge among those that are privy to insider information, that students will be consulted by the Task Force. In iSAD email conversation, one of the program Dean's stated that "The task force has the interests of the students at heart and it will provide opportunities for student input." We don't know how that Dean arrived at that conclusion, but we hope it is true. Until we hear otherwise, we can only wait.


What we would propose however, instead of waiting, is for the Task Force to arrange a town hall type meeting organized at each of the four Ontario universities where students (and interns) could come together to hear about the work of the Task Force to date. We would suggest that such a town hall would be open only to students/interns in order for them to feel free to speak openly about their experiences and responses to information being shared by the Task Force.


So, we are looking for an indication from you, Task Force members, that our voice counts as you reconsider the education and training processes that impact our path to becoming dietitians. 


On behalf of all Ontario food and nutrition/dietetics students as well as interns, we ask you for any information whatsoever of what your work has produced and we would be happy to provide feedback from our perspectives.


Sincerely,
iSAD

Another Influence to the Dietetic Landscape

E-mail received from anonymouslytoisad@gmail.com   

Many students decide to do a Masters degree when they do not obtain an internship position within a Hospital program. Several Masters programs actually combine an MSc degree with a dietetic internship. This is the new alternative way to go about becoming a dietitian.

Now, more than ever, there are more interns and dietitians with Masters degrees. How are these dietitians to be treated – like advanced practice dietitians? Should they be compensated differently? Be promoted to leadership roles, despite having little real-world experience? Perhaps maybe internship should be a two year MSc degree/or a 5 year undergraduate/Masters degree with a practicum component. This would be similar to other professions (i.e. speech language pathologists), which is a totally different model for dietetic training not yet suggested. Not that I personally think it is better, but it is another option.

Based on the current availability of combined MSc training programs, I think eventually there may be two tiers of dietitians: those with graduate degrees and those without. I’m interested to know what students and dietitians think about how these programs are going to influence the dietetic landscape.

We've Come a Long Way

In one month, the iSAD blog and twitter feed have registered:

5200 page views – 183 comments – 80 twitter followers – 47 tweets – 20 posts – 1 poll

The conversation has moved from a sharing of impact statements to a sharing of ideas for improving the current system. Along the way, many misperceptions have been aired out – iSAD blog visitors have enthusiastically informed each other of the realities of being a student, intern, preceptor, coordinator, and educator. Students are not spoiled, entitled brats. Interns work really hard and learn lots. Preceptors lack adequate time to spend with interns. Internship coordinators are feeling pressured by an overwhelming large number of applicants for an underwhelming small number of positions. Educators are facing increasing enrollments and accreditation demands.

The blog has not registered a post or comment explicitly from Dietitians of Canada or the Task Force, although all have been informed of its existence. This is unfortunate. Their voices and representation are missed, but always welcome.

There are clearly issues with the internship system, which we have demarcated as beginning with being a student to completing an internship placement. We have noticed that while blaming individuals was the initial, hurtful response, we can certainly see that people have mostly shifted into identifying structural changes that can enhance the education and training of future members of the dietetics profession.

We have even had calls for renaming the blog. We have considered and discussed this request very carefully. While we acknowledge and applaud a move away from only being “sad,” and towards constructive, collective brainstorming, it is more important to remember that the sadness and hurt is what motivated the blog to be created and what enabled students a safe place to share their feelings – FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER! This blog will continue to provide that space for the emotional stories AND will promote constructive and collaborative moves forward. Both can happen without neglecting or diminishing the other. We hope that internshipSeasonalAffectiveDisorder motivates and reminds us to strive for making improvements to the system.

For people who want to RANT, you are welcome to it. Just let it out, spill your feelings. Anonymously. Tell *your* truth. Don't be silent about how the current system has affected YOU and the people that care about you.

For people who want to put forward ideas in support of change – all ideas are worthy of consideration – please feel free to post or comment everywhere else. We will still accept posts from the anonymouslytoisad@gmail.com and from theprojectisad@gmail.com email portals.

We wish this to be a place that registers and promotes an historic change in the way internships are done in Ontario. We are pleased so many of you are bearing witness to these changes. We hope that more of you will feel free to share your stories, your ideas, and your hopes for a better future. We believe this better future is possible and within our grasp. We want to see that future arrive very soon.